Are You Kidding Me?

I should be cleaning my house right now. After the last two weeks we have had my house looks like a cyclone hit it. I am currently sitting on my couch staring at four baskets of clothes that need to be folded, a coffee table overloaded with research studies about the brain that need to be read for my grad class, and an empty aquarium that needs to be set up for my classroom turtle. In the rooms I can’t see there are piles of laundry, floors that need to be swept, and more dishes than I care to think of that need to be washed. Instead, I am sitting, dripping in sweat from my walk, contemplating if I should share this journey I find myself on. To say my world has been turned upside down might be an understatement. I find myself in the midst of a crisis and it takes a lot to consider being vulnerable about my reactions to it. Super Christian, I am definitely not. I would be closer to Peter than to Paul. But perhaps, you are like me. Perhaps, you are struggling through a circumstance you never could have anticipated. Perhaps you’ve had the wind knocked out of you and you are fearing what might come next. And, maybe, if we do this journey together, we can find a greater community of believers, a stronger faith, and a deeper more personal relationship with Jesus. If that’s you, than welcome to Soggy Shoes and Shaky Faith.

What do Soggy Shoes have to do with faith?

On June 28, my husband, Mike, went for what we thought was a fairly routine upper endoscopy. He had been having difficulty swallowing and his doctors felt that he had scar tissue from damage caused by years of acid reflux. We were completely unprepared to be told that the doctor discovered two tumors. While he would not commit to what it was, he did indicate that benign tumors of the esophagus are rare. I was completely devastated. Did Mike have cancer? What were we going to do? We had had a rough year, why was God allowing more? In those moments, I remembered a book I had recently read called The Cirlce Maker. In the book, Mark Batterson encourages his readers to pray circles around their dreams and their fears. I decided to literally circle my house seven times a day and pray for a miracle. On the second day, it started pouring when I started my seven circles. By the end of my first circle, my clothes were soaked and my shoes had puddles inside of them. Despite the discomfort, I kept on walking and pleading for God to show up in a miraculous way but,doubting that He would. So that’s why I’m here. To share what I learn in this journey I am taking with my soggy shoes and shaky faith.